YA Gets Real: But School

Lindi sank into the seat next to Chris with a huff. She glanced over at him, her blue eyes blazing as she thought about the days ahead. Knowing she had to tell Chris the bad news broke her heart almost as much has having to repeat the same cycle over and over again.

Every semester since they had started high school, Chris and Lindi had saved the world. No one noticed, or if they did, no one cared. First, it had been the wild bats that could transform into hybrid invisible monsters. Second, the wild, mutant lizards that came out of the sewer system. Third, the talking rabbits who controlled every student's mind in the school.

Lindi was forced into this life because she knew Chris, but Chris fell into this because he drank some sea monkey water on a dare when he was nine. For whatever reason, those sea monkeys changed his body from the inside out, giving him the ability to heal rapidly, breathe underwater, and turn microscopic. Maybe they had been radioactive, maybe it was some chemical experiment, but whatever the reason, Chris was superhuman now.

"I've been doing some research," Lindi started.

"No. No research." Chris looked at her, eyes half-lidded and his irises almost black. "We can't save the world again, Lindi. I need to focus on school."

"I know, but this is really important. This Friday, there's going to be Medusa-like snakes called Lo--"

Chris slammed his head down on the desk. One of his pencils rattled, falling off the desk onto the floor. A few students turned their heads, but this kind of behavior was normal for the two weird kids. Chris's voice came out muffled from the wood. "I can't do this Friday."

"Can't do this Friday?! The supernatural isn't going to wait for a convenient time."

"I have a swimming meet, and Coach said if I miss one more, I'm off the team for good." He rolled his head to the side so he could look up at Lindi. His cheek was squished against the desk. "I can't lose swimming. It's the only thing that will get me into college."

"If you don't miss it, then--"

"Not to mention the report we have due for Mrs. Welsher's class." He lifted his head and glared at Lindi. "There is absolutely no way I can save the world this Friday. My personal future depends on it."

Lindi stood up, grabbing the backpack that she had just put down and began to storm out of the classroom. Her wedges slapped against the ground.

Chris caught up to her in a matter of seconds, snagging her arm. "Where are you going?"

She turned, glaring at him with an icy look that could cut glass. Her short bleached hair hung messily around her ears. "I'm going to find someone help me save the world. If you aren't going to, I'm sure there's some other powerful person who will. Besides, none of have a future if these snakes get loose."

Dropping her arm, Chris let out a defeated sigh. "What time are the evil snakes from wherever supposed to get here?"

Lindi straightened her back. "Around nine at Jonesbury Park, through a rift between our world and theirs." A small smile curled her lips, despite her best efforts to keep it at bay.

"My meet should be over by 9. I'll get there as soon as I can. Just ... Do your thing and keep them busy for me?" Chris's eyes softened.

Lindi grabbed his hand with hers. Their hands were the perfect size, his ever so slightly bigger. They nestled together like they were made for each other. "You got it. And on Sunday, we can sit down to write that paper together."

"Why Sunday?"

"Because you're going to spend Saturday healing and being all macho about how you just saved the world, again."

Chris frowned, but it was erased the second Lindi's lips touched his cheek. She gave him a small kiss and floated back to her seat, satisfied that Chris had agreed to save the world again. Now if only the rifts would stop appearing, maybe they could have a normal high school experience.

---

Thanks for reading the parody series YA Gets Real. If you enjoy supernatural stories, consider some of the following titles. Patrick Ness's The Rest of Us Just Live Here plays with this trope a lot, and I absolutely adore the book, so pick it up. All the cover images link to Amazon.

YA Gets Real: New Girl

Harvey smirked, giving me a slick sideways glance with his dark brown, almond-shaped eyes. He slid his chair a little closer to me. We were in our homeroom in the science lab. I was surprised when he sat down next to me, but became even more surprised when he kept staring.

"Hey," he said.

"Hi?"

"What's your name?"

I swear my jaw dropped to the floor. Over the summer, I had gotten laser eye surgery, finally ridding myself of the thick bottle glasses that had framed my face since before first grade. But I was still the same old me. Same red braid off to one side, same crystal eyes, same fair skin.

"Anna? You know, the girl you've been in school with since we were six?" I inched my chair away from him, and it grated against the tiles.

He narrowed his eyes, looking me up and down with keen interest. It practically made my skin run out of the room without me. "Anna ..." Harvey leaned back in his chair, rocking on two legs for a second as he switched his eyes to the ceiling. "Cunningham?" The chair slammed back down on the ground as he leaned onto the lab table.

"Harvey, jeez, yeah." I swallowed. My fingers curled around my bag, ready to run or hit him with it depending on whatever he said next.

"Huh." His eyebrows furrowed. Even when he looked confused, he was still fairly attractive. I mean, he was Harvey Orion, pretty much the pinnacle of the stars coming down and making a guy in their dream image. "You look ... different."

I rolled my eyes. "I don't have glasses anymore."

"Oh." He paused, frowning. "That must be it. So anyway, you're, like, really hot, Anna."

I continued staring at him with an arched eyebrow, not sure if that warranted a response. Surely he tried harder to date Sandra and Katrina, right? They were gorgeous. It had to have taken more of an effort than "you're, like, really hot."

"We should go on a date or whatever. You know?"

"No, I don't know." I grabbed my bag and stood up. "We've gone eleven years of our lives not speaking to each other. Why don't we make it the full twelve. Okay?" I turned to leave, but he snagged my arm.

"Anna, don't be like that. Just because I didn't recognize you doesn't mean-"

"It means everything, Harvey. I was invisible to you just because of my glasses." I yanked my hand back and shook it like his were hot coals. "I would never date someone as shallow as that." I went to the front of the room and slid into another seat.

Just as I did, Rebecca whispered a little too loudly to her neighbor, "What's the new girl's problem?"

I banged my forehead against the desk. This was going to be a long start to senior year.

- - -

YA Gets Real is a parody young adult flash fiction series where my main characters experience typical tropes that you can find in Young Adult Literature. I love Young Adult, but I use this series to turn the typical encounter on its head. If you like YA Gets Real, consider sharing it with someone you know would get a kick out of it. Check out all the past stories here.

YA Gets Real: Wizard School

The rolling hills fly past us as we head down the lush landscape and into a deep valley. I'm adoring the drive, and my mind rushes with the ideas of how the next four years will play out. To think, my parents had been keeping this a secret my whole life.

"We wanted you to grow up as a normal girl," Mom said.

"That meant keeping your past a secret from you." My dad nodded.

I grin as I look up at the clear blue sky. All of those things I read about were true. The fantasy books they gifted me as presents were hints, and I never knew how real they were until my parents confessed everything a few days ago. They had signed me up for my first year at Harringtons, a school for girls who are training in the magical arts. They had handed me a brochure which featured this great stone building, and it looked magical.

We turn onto a long drive and come to wrought iron gates. My dad presses the small red button, and the intercom comes on. A lady on the other side greets us cheerfully, and the gates swing open. Our car carries us all the way up the gravel path to the steps heading into the main gorgeous building on campus.

I step out of the car with my backpack on my shoulder and slam the door shut behind me. I take in the large steeples, the antique window frames, and warm stone of the structure. The building looms over us, but feels welcoming and cozy just the same.

My mom helps me get my two bags out of the trunk and gives me a wide smile. Something about it feels strange though, because normally her eyes light up. Maybe she's sad about me going away to school. "Honey, I want you to know, we love you." She pulls me into a hug.

My dad presses his hand on my shoulder, which is about as affectionate as he'll get these days. "Do you want help inside?"

A woman with a clipboard comes out from inside Harringtons. She has a pen tucked behind her ear, and her hair is pulled taut away from her face. "You must be Delilah."

Both of my parents back away from me, as if this woman is going to burst into flames. Perhaps she can.

"We'll be seeing you on holiday." My dad slides into the car, and my mom hesitates with her hand around the handle.

"I have in my paperwork that your parents told you about Harringtons."

I turn back to the woman and nod, eager.

The lady glances at my mom and gives her tight-lipped smile. The engine of the car starts behind me, and the gravel shifts underneath the car as they pull away from the building.

"I'm Mrs. Sutherland, and I'm afraid I have some grave news." She swallows, and my face falls. "You see, we're a boarding school. Just a regular one."

"But ..." I scrunch my face up. My parents had been telling me about my past for months. There had to be some kind of a mistake. "What about the brochure?"

"We made them so parents could convince their kids to come here. You see ... Most children don't want to come to boarding school, so at Harringtons, we decided to make the transition a little easier." The lady stands upright and looks down her long nose at me. "We do have some of the best classes and professors this state has to offer. And most students who graduate from here go onto do amazing things."

"But nothing magical," I say, crushed.

"Nothing magical. Just the wonders of the natural universe, I'm afraid." Mrs. Sutherland laughs to herself. It's high and tinny, but I don't get the joke.

She turns and heads up the stairs, carrying one of my bags with her. I grab the other and trudge in her wake, counting down the days until I could scream at my parents.

As much as I'm mad at them, I'm more angry with myself for believing them. Magic. Yeah, right.

- - -

Oh man, I wish Wizarding School existed in real life. I've been in love with the idea of being called to an adventure most of my life. This is probably why I read and write as much as I do, and go out hiking when the weather will let me.

Thanks for reading YA Gets Real! It's a parody series that takes some of my favorite YA tropes and turns them into something more realistic. Although this one is pretty silly in itself.

If you want to read about people learning about their supernatural abilities, consider some of the following titles:
 

YA Gets Real: Don't Go Inside the House

The lone house loomed at the end of the street, dark and foreboding. Night crept around the car's headlights, trying to shut off what little light illuminated the front of the building. As Trevor cut the engine, a crow cawed in the distance.

"This doesn't look anything like the brochure." Katie held up the bed and breakfast pamphlet, one that promised pampering and relaxation. She glanced between the brochure and the house. The sign that hung on rusted nails came loose at that moment, and half of it fell in a pendulum arc, swaying back and forth to the breeze.

"Yeah," Trevor said, holding his gaze steady on the house. He wouldn't claim to be afraid of whatever was inside, not in front of the girl he was trying to impress, but he also didn't want to step foot inside the house.

The wooden paneling was a gray, faded from the bright white that the pictures of it reflected in its glory days. The paint was chipped and peeled, flaking off in the least bit of wind. Each window was smeared and tarnished with years of grime, unknown in origin. The porch held a single rocking chair, one that eerily tilted with the wind, creaking all the way.

"Maybe ..." Katie let her voice trail off as she stuffed the brochure back in the glove compartment. "Maybe we shouldn't go inside?" She rubbed her arms, trying to stop the goosebumps from forming on her skin.

"I mean, it doesn't look anything like the advertisement." Playing it cool, Trevor tapped his fingers on the wheel. "If you want, I mean, we could ..." He shifted his gaze to Katie, hoping she would tell him to get out of there.

Katie took another look at the house. The roof hanging over the porch seemed ready to collapse on itself. Curiosity had run through her, but she didn't like the looks of those steps. If something happened to her already sprained ankle, she could be looking at sitting out the rest of field hockey season.

Just then, a small flicker of a light danced in one of the upper rooms. The couple blinked and leaned forward, trying to get a better look, but the house offered no answers. The yellow glow eased in and out of existence, almost like it wasn't real.

"We probably shouldn't go investigate," Trevor said. To heck with trying to appear cool, he had no desire to die at this old house.

"No, you're right. This place gives me the creeps." Katie squeezed Trevor's arm. "Hey, look." She held her phone up to him, and he was momentarily blinded by the blue glow. "I found a place with better reviews. Want to go?"

"Sure," Trevor said, turning the car around.

For the seventh time this month, the spirit was annoyed that social media existed. The ghost sighed. Someday, maybe, someone's phone would fail and leave them with no other option than to go inside.

- - -

These posts are silly, parody posts of some scenes that can be found in YA tropes intended to make you smile for your weekend. I adore YA books, as a reader and a writer. These stories are fiction, but provide a possible alternative to scenes from stories we love.

Titles I enjoyed where the MC does investigate (linked images):
            

YA Gets Real: Invisibility

No one could see me. I was standing in the middle of the crowd at the park, and no one bothered to look my way. I finally did it. I found a way to become invisible, and this moment was the most glorious of my life!

I threw my arms out and tilted my head back, indulging my face with the warmth of the sun. The breeze blew around me, making the fine hairs on my body tremble. I needed something more; I needed to push the limits.

Glancing around, I did a little jig, something someone would have to acknowledge if they could see me. I thrust my hips around in a wide circle, jumped up and down, and did what few swing steps I knew. Still, no one spared me a glance. Everyone was on their way to work, busying themselves on their phones. Everyone was blind to me.

Because I had succeeded.

Grinning, I pulled off my shirt, tossing it into the nearby fountain. Without me, my shirt would probably look odd, suddenly appearing out of thin air. But who cared? No one could blame me. No one would figure out who I was.

I unhooked my bra and tossed it into the fountain too. I spun in a circle, loving the caress of the outdoor air. Finally, I reached down to undo my jeans, but two hands clasped around my wrists, forcing my arms behind my back. I stifled a scream and blinked.

How could he see me? Did he have powers too?

The police officer pulled me towards his vehicle, growling something about protesters. He shoved me unceremoniously in the backseat, and I wanted to cry. My potion hadn't worked on this man, but why? No one else had looked at me, so why him? Why someone who could ruin my life?

---

I waited in the holding cell by myself, being the only minor there. They had given me a large sweatshirt to pull over my head. The spell had obviously worn off in the car ride over. I sighed. Showed what I knew about magic, and how long it could last.

"This has all been a misunderstanding." My ears perked up at the sound of Dad's voice.

"A misunderstanding? Your daughter was tearing her clothes off in the middle of Central--"

"I understand what she was doing, but you have to understand she's off her medication. She always thinks she's a wizard when..." he continued talking, but my blood boiled.

No, Dad. I don't think. I know, I thought bitterly.

"And why would a wizard get naked in public?" The cop sounded bored.

"She believes she can make potions that actually work, and if a wizard could become invisible..." Dad was probably shrugging, even though I couldn't see him. But whenever his voice trailed off like that, he shrugged, as if that would explain everything.

"Fill out these forms," the cop scoffed.

I shook my head back and forth. None of them understood. It had worked, albeit for a short time. No one had seen me. I could have done anything at all. The medication blocked my powers. Why couldn't they understand that? If they put me back on it, it was goodbye powers, hello mundane high school life.

I kicked my feet out, bouncing slightly on the spring-filled cot, anxiety pulsing through me.

"You crazy?" One of the women from across the way asked. Her gray eyes narrowed.

I shook my head, frowning. "Not crazy, just... powerful."

The woman nodded. "I was powerful too, once. But they always take it away."

---

These posts are silly, parody posts of some scenes that can be found in YA tropes intended to make you smile on your Monday morning. I adore YA books, as a reader and a writer. These stories are fiction, but provide a possible alternative to scenes from stories we love.

A few titles I enjoyed where the MC has a special ability (linked images):

 Adult title: